TEN BEST GOLF CADDY REMARKS

#10
Golfer:  ‘Think I’m going to drown myself in the lake.’
Caddy:  ‘Think you can keep your head down that long?’

#9
Golfer:  ‘I’d move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course.’
Caddy:  ‘Try heaven, you’ve already moved most of the earth.’

#8
Golfer:  ‘Do you think my game is improving?’
Caddy:  ‘Yes sir, you miss the ball much closer now.’

#7
Golfer:  ‘Do you think I can get there with a 5 iron?’
Caddy:  ‘Eventually.’

#6
Golfer:  ‘You’ve got to be the worst caddy in the world.’
Caddy:  ‘I don’t think so sir.  That would be too much of a
             coincidence.’

#5
Golfer:  ‘Please stop checking your watch all the time.  It’s a
             distraction.’
Caddy: ‘It’s not a watch - it’s a compass.’

#4
Golfer: ‘That can’t be my ball, it’s too old.’
Caddy: ‘It’s been a long time since we teed off, sir.’

#3
Golfer:  ‘How do you like my game?’
Caddy:  ‘Very good sir, but personally, I prefer golf.’

#2
Golfer:  ‘This is the worst course I’ve ever played on.’
Caddy:  ‘This isn’t the golf course.  We left that an hour ago.’

#1
Golfer:  ‘Do you think it’s a sin to play on Sundays?
Caddy:  ‘The way you play, sir, it’s a sin on any day.’

And the old favourite.....is the one about the golfer who has been
slicing off the tee at every hole.  He finally gives up and asks his
long suffering caddy if he has seen any obvious problems to
which the caddy replies....
’There’s a bit of shit on the end of your club Sir’.
The golfer picks up his club and cleans the club face at which point the caddy says’.  The other end, Sir’.

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